thoughts from Oaxaca I

Its been a while since my last post….I havent had too much to report….not being in spain anymore – i havent been as up on my basque news as i should be….ive made my way to the province of Oaxaca where my bf is working – and there really isnt too much to do down here – hence the lack of posts….

ive been sort of mopey and thought i should at least write a quick update – and maybe it might help my oaxaca blues….

Arrived last week – since then about 4 or 5 days into it – I had a big scare and probably one of the worst nights of my life….got a nice case of Salmonella poisoning….which led to an ambulance ride and an overnight stay in a dirty mexican hospital – on a stretcher that felt more like a surfboard than a bed – for 24 hours – my arms black and blue from way too many iv attempts…apparently my veins are thin…and with the salmonella poisoning came gastroenteritis – which essentially is an infection in your intestines from bad bacteria and with those blood results came a kidney infection which they say ive had for some time now.. but didnt know….

as you can imagine – not a fun week – ive been on antibiotics and since then – developed a lovely skin rash as a reaction to the medication ive been on which has now spread to both arms, the back of my shoulder and parts of my legs….lovely. This might have something to do with my mood these days….

Where the bf is working – its about one hour from where the hotel is and the hotel is situated btwn 2 towns – Juchitan and Tehuantipec – both with very very little to do or see – so im basically stuck in the hotel- luckily with internet access.

So needless to say ive been a bit mopey. The weekends are lovely. We’ve gone to Huatulco to an all inclusive every weekend- its what these guys do when they work hard all week and not much else to do for them – so the beach resort with the all inclusive deal is the way to go. And thats been really nice. Hualtulco is a beautiful little city/town – which looks more touristy than it really is. If you’re looking to relax…with the family/kids…its a great place…not a lot of night life – its more tranquilo but still just as touristy as you need it to be…

I think a big part of my being so down is also that i didnt expect to miss Spain so much. I met some amazing people there and there is so much going on….it really has become a part of me – the people I interacted with became a part of me…the little Euskara Ive learned and my eagerness to learn about the people and the conflict there really affected me…and what I feel now as I leave that behind for now is overwhelming….and feeling this was not

image taken from google images

expected…I am very much looking forward to going back…and perhaps making a life there….

The spanish crew finish up work this week or next and from here – the bf and I will head up to where my relatives are to spend the holidays as well as see my mom. Which im really looking forward to!

I dont want to be so negative. I am very very appreciative of this whole experience. And it definately has been one i wont forget so far. And the  bf is so very supportive…so very sweet and generous…i really have nothing to complain about….well..i think im entitled to complain a little with the whole salmonella poisoning/going into shock thing….but i promise it wont be for too long…but  I am in mexico -its hot..and beautiful….(in its own way where i am) and Im headed to the Yucatan for New Years….life is really really good to me….

there’s a part of me that feels really guilty though. My family works hard. My mom…dad…my brothers and my sister all work really hard – and although my life is in a different place than theirs…which allows me to do these things – its hard to accept all the time. And I know some of them may resent me for it….and its hard not to take that on. But the truth of the matter is – I dont have kids…I dont have a mortgage…I dont have major responsibilities except for school….and that does give me a bit more space to do these kinds of things than they have…and what I hear all the time – from people I love and respect…who have had both or havent had one or the other – is to do it now…while I can. Bc once I do have kids…or a family…a house – I wont have this kind of freedom..so as long as Im not hurting my family in any way (financially) – this is ok  – and actually Im really lucky. I am very aware of that.

I have amazing people in my life that want to share things with me – whether i can afford it or not – and its because of them Ive been able to experience so much…I am very blessed  – and all i can do is work hard to finish school so i can find a job i love and feel passionate about – so i can in turn give back..and help my family when they need it…

Well – thats me for now – a little bit of a boring update – but i felt like writing a little – getting some thoughts out….and sharing….

Ill upload some photos soon as well as create a new post or two with them….

Hasta pronto…

 

more arrests in basque country

34 more arrests were made yesterday here in Basque Country. This time it wasn’t leaders of the banned political party Batasuna…or violent supporters of ETA….it was 34 youth – youth that are openly pro independent…34 youth that may or may not be part of the banned pro independent youth organization SEGI.

Apparently this was one of the largest police operations of this kind in decades – with over 92 properties searched and more than 600 police officers involved.

Right now these 34 individuals are being held in Madrid – incommunicado – according to news source GARA their rights to speak with their lawyers as well as see a trusted doctor have been denied. Family members also have no further information more than that they are currently being held in Madrid.

The law states that basque political prisoners can be held for up to 4 days,  i believe,  incommunicado – so their deadline is this saturday at midnight – unlikely that all 34 detainees will be granted this by then.

I just dont understand this. Spain is a democratic country right? Where is freedom of speech? Where is freedom of association and the right to assemble?? Basque people do not have this right. Last month – 5 militants were arrested for meeting to discuss the future of their country. Because these people were members of the banned political party Batasuna and the pro independence union LAB among others – these people are now in jail. Because it is illegal for any sort of association to happen here. It is illegal for these groups to discuss their own future and the politics of their country if it doesnt align with the ideology of the current right laying  spanish government.

How is this conflict ever going to end if the people of this region cant assembe to discuss these matters? If you are a seperatist – according to the Spanish government – or at least their actions suggest this -  you are considered a criminal. A terrorist even. Because you share the same ideology as that of a violent radical group – you are liable to be imprisoned…to be held incommunicado and/or tortured even? Where is democracy in that? Not everyone in this part of spain is a radical supporter of ETA. And not everyone agrees with the violence. But because they want to be an independent nation – they are criminals.

Im just so confused. These people have no idea where their children are. They are 34 youths that want to stand up for what they believe in. Non violently.

This is the situation here in Basque Country….Pais Vasco…Euskal Herria…this is the state of affairs…this is the sad state of affairs that these people are in…..

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translation/traduccion

I think its time i start trying to write in spanish – the more i can practice the better – plus – there are some great people in my life i want to share this blog with  but because english isnt their first language – makes things a bit more difficult…so I will try to translate some of my previous posts….lets see….

Creo que es tiempo a intentar a escribir en castellano…lo mas que puedo practicar…el mejor para mi….tambien..hay gente en mi vida con quien quiero compartir este blog…y es dificil pq ingles no es su primer idioma….entonces….voy a intentare a traducir algunos de mis otros posts….pero sin traductor eh!! espero que me puede intender! Y por favor – si ves errores – por favor..dejar un comentario! OH! Y tambien…mi laptop es de canada ..entonces no tengo los accentos o cosas asi…lo siento.

Y un dia..espero que puedo escribir en euskara tambien!! pero poliki poliki eh!!

 

this beautiful city…

Plaza Del Castillo in the evening..

 

untitled/sin titulo…

I feel nostalgic for a place ive never been before…im looking out my window here…sipping my tea…listening to some johnny coltrane…smelling the crisp fall basque air…and I am missing things that have never happened….its sort of a strange de ja vu….thoughts of memories (or future memories??) are popping into my head…and i am overwhelmed with a yearning for things ive never experienced here…yet…..

night in casco viejo

Siento nostalga por un lugar que nunca he estado antes….en este momento..estoy mirando por la ventana…bebiendo mi te..escuchando un poco de Johnny Coltrane…y respirando el aire fresco y vasco del otono…siento que falta cosas que nunca he pasado…es como un “de ja vu” raro…tengo pensamientos de recuerdos…quizas son recuerdos del futuro…yo se como suena esto…pero es la verdad…estoy abrumado con una anorar de algo….por algo que no he tendio..o hasta ahora no tengo…

 

 

ill miss…./ voy a extañar….

I’ll miss the silence of the streets at 3 o’clock…

and i’ll miss getting pan (bread) from the taberna…everyday…

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Voy a extrañar el silencio de las calles a las 3 del dia…

y voy a extrañar comprando el pan…de la taberna..cada dia…

 

thoughts as i leave…/pensamientos antes de irme…

My days are nearing their end here in Basque Country…and Im not sure im ready to leave…but a good friend of mine told me once that its always better to leave a place wanting more….i think she’s right…..and I definitely will leave this place..wanting more….

The worst part is though im leaving with a feeling that i have unfinished work….i have yet to go to all the political parties and question/get their side regarding the conflict….i have yet to have another chat with the political prisoner I spoke with before….there are people here that have been helping me find information in english..they’ve helped me learn as much as I can about the conflict….and I was hoping to see some of them again….I was going to go to one of the leftist pro – independence labour unions with one of those helpful individuals….Ive just started making contacts and connections..people have opened up to share wtih me…and are starting to trust this strange foreigner girl that eats as she walks and asks way too many questions about a very very complicated and delicate issue…I guess I could still continue to research and learn from afar…but i just…Im just..Im just not so ready to leave…..

there is so much happening here…right under the noses of the global community…Im still trying to figure out why we dont hear more about it on the news….i just really think its so important to document as much of this as possible….not that Im the one to do it..I just have a deep interest in hearing people’s stories…and getting a glimpse into the world’s of other’s….as well as learn about what conflict does to people….its so interesting …us…humans..and how we live..how we treat others…

I really should have been born more creative…then i could maybe find a way to transform this information into art…and help that way… but..unfortunately…not a creative bone in this body…i know..strange isnt it!? I would think there would be too..but there really isnt.

Anyways..im taking my time as I walk around these last few days..Im trying to make sure I dont miss anything when I look around…and that I breathe all of this in….this wonderfully beautiful complex part of the world…its been an eye opener…and a inspiration to be here…even if all i really got was just a tiny glimpse…it was a good…fulfilling…and interesting one to say the least….

and I think from my time here – my focus is starting to shape itself a bit more….conflict resolution perhaps…peace and security..ish..maybe somewhere in that area….

we’ll see what this experience brings me….or perhaps… it would be more fitting to say…what i decide to bring to it.

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Mis dias aqui en el pais vasco….son casi terminados…y no estoy segura que estoy lista a ir..pero una amiga buena mia…me dijo una vez..que es mejor a ir a un sitio querendo mas….y pienso que tiene razon…y seguro..que voy a ir de este lugar..querendo mas..

El peor cosa es que me voy a ir con un sentimiento que tengo mas cosas que hacer…todavia no fue a todos los partidos politicos….y preguntales sobre el conflicto…todavia queria volver a hablar con el presa con quien hable antes…hay gente aqui…que son muy majos..y han ayudandome mcuho…ayudando a encontrar informacion en ingles…aprender sobre el conflicto…queria hablar con ellos mas…tambien queria ir a un sindicato…

hace poco estaba haciendo contactos..y relaciones con gente…la gente ya empiezen a abrir un poco mas conmigo…y compartir mas conmigo…han empezando a tener confianza en este rara chica de canada que come cuando esta caminando…y que tiene bastante preguntas sobre una tema muy delicada…

pero..tal vez puedo continuar todo esto de mi pais…espero que si…pero solo que no estoy lista a irme…

hay demasiado cosas que estan pasando aqui ahora…abajo de las narizes del comunidad global….todavia estoy tratando a entender pq no oimos mas de esto en nuestras noticias….que pienso que es muy importante a documentar lo mas que es posible…no pienso que yo soy la persona para hacer esto..solo tengo mucha interes en las vidas de otras personas….sus luchados…me gusta oir las historias de otra gente…y tener un vislumbre/vistazo (??? ok use el traductor aqui) adentro las vidas de otras personas…y tambien me gusta aprender como los conflictos afectar la gente….es muy interestante…nosotros…los humanos…como somos…y como vivimos…y como tratamos otras personas…

A veces pienso que es muy triste….que no soy artistica..mas creativa…porque si seria mas creativa…tal vez podria transformar todo lo que estoy aprendiendo into (??) alguna forma del arte…y ayudar en este manera…pero desgraciadamente…no tengo una hueso creativa en mi cuerpo..raro no!!??  Pensarias que si no??Pero la verdad es que no soy…y no tengo…

de todos formas…estoy tomando mi tiempo cuando camino estos ultimas dias que tengo….no quiero perder nada….quiero respirar todo de este complejo hermoso parte del mundo…aprendi mucho aqui…mis ojos son mas abiertos ahora…y estoy muy inspirada …aunque quizas solo tuve una vislumbre/vistazo (??) pequeno…era un buen vislumbre/vistazo…y interestante a decir lo menos…

y yo pienso…de mi tiempo aqui….mi foco esta empezando a tener un poco mas forma…el resolucion del conflictos quizas..paz y seguridad…mas o menos en este area…

vamos a ver que  me va a traer este experiencia..o quizas mejor a decir..que voy a traer a este experiencia …..

 

dont worry mom – im in good hands. / No te precoupes mama – estan cuidandome!

Im so sick. Its the 3rd time in less than 2 months…..how horrible….

but i was inspired to write a quick post….

I am laying here…in my boyfriends bed…and not in his bed at his own house…but in his bed at his parents house….in Spain….and I have just been brought my medicine promptly at 6 pm as I am supposed to take it  at that time..not by my boyfriend…. but by his mother. It was accompanied with 4 cookies and a coffee. Made – surprisingly – just the way i like it – and i rarely drink coffee…now….i know that in Canada – to bring someone a coffee with their medicine is not really what we would do – well..not in my house anyways..i dont think ive ever drank coffee when i was sick..but this is not the point….the point is this:

being able to help someone is such a beautiful gift to give.

His parents and I havent spent a lot of time together – a few days here and there….but here i am – in their son’s bed…in thier home….while their son is working out of the country – and here they are taking care of me as if i was family. I couldnt be more grateful.

And it doesnt end there- not only did they take me to the hospital yesterday and get me into see a doctor free of charge (technically I should have paid. almost $100 euros as a foreigner) but they also got me my medicine..also free of charge. And last night -as I got into bed for the night – after his mother rubbed me down – my feet (before actually putting socks on my feet for me), my back and my chest with vick’s vapo rub – ha…she also tucked me in. Im 30. And I have to admit – that I think i just discovered that I LOVE being tucked in!!  I havent been so well taken care of since i lived at home…and that was over 13 years ago….

how lovely is that. I had to share it. Although there are some customs here that back home you just would never do ie. tell someone to drink coca cola when they have an upset stomache- and tell them its good for them – i cringe just at the thought of this…and there is a lot more where that came from….but regardless – im happy to expereince all this first hand….and I am lucky…very very lucky to have these amazing generous people in my life…..and now i understand why my boyfriend is the way he is…for his parents..

i might be sick – but im smiling and feeling very well taken care of. what a beautiful gift.

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Estoy muy enferma…es la tercera vez en menos que 2 meses…que horible!

pero…estaba inspirada a escribir un post rapido…

Estoy por aqui en la cama …en la cama de mi novio…y no en su cama en su casa…pero en su cama en la casa de sus padres…aqui en espania…mejor en el pais vasco…en navarra…y acabo de tomar mi medicina..puntualmente a las seis…mi novio no le trajo..pero su madre me lo trajo…y tambien…viene con 4 galletas y cafe..estaba sorpredida porque el cafe fue exactamente como mi gusta…y casi nunca bebo cafe…

Yo se en canada…llevar alguien un cafe con su medicina no es realmente lo que hariamos…bueno..no en mi casa…no creo que he tomado cafe cuando estaba enferma..pero esto no es mi punto…el punto es este…

que ser capaz a ayudar alguien es una regalo muy hermoso a dar alguien..

Sus padres y yo no tenemos mucho tiempo juntos…unos dias aqui y alla pero aqui estoy..en la cama de su hijo…en su casa..mientras su hijo esta trabajando afuera del pais…y aquí están cuidandome como soy familia. No podría estar más agradecida a ellos….

Y no termina allí….no sólo que  me llevan al hospital ayer y ayudarme a ver un médico..gratis (técnicamente debería  pagar como casi 100 Euros pq soy extranjera), pero también me ayudar tener mi medicina .. también gratis… Y anoche, cuando me metí en la cama por la noche – su madre puso Vick’s Vapo Rub en  mis pies (tambien tengo q decir que ella  antes de  poner el vicks…puso los calcetines en mis pies para mí!!), en mi espalda y tambien en mi pecho!! Tambien…antes de irse…ella puso los blankets (??) on me!! (En ingles  dicimos “tucked me into bed” cuando alguien ayuda con los blankets para tu estas comodo) Tengo 30 anos..y tengo que admitir – que creo que acabo de descubrir que me encanta estar metida en la cama (esta bien dicho??)!! No he sido tan bien cuidado hasta desde  que vivía en mi casa con mi mama … y eso fue  más que 13 años

(yo se que este parte es horible – pero no se como decir todo esto – espero q me intiendes – use el traductor por mucho de esto..y no se…)

pero que hermosa es todo esto….tenia que compartir esto con vosotros..Aunque hay algunos custumbres…que en Canada nunca hicimos…como decir a alguien a beber una coca cola cuando tiene dolor en su estomago…y dile que es bueno por esto…nadie en canada va a hacer o decir esto…para nosotros..esto no es normal…y hay mas…pero a pesar de todo…estoy muy feliz a tener este experiencia de todo esto…y tengo mucha suerte….estoy muy muy afortunada…a tener gente asi…tan generosos…y increibles…en mi vida…ahora yo intiendo pq mi novio es como es…

estoy enferma..es la verdad…pero estoy sonriendo…y siento muy muy taken care of (??? cuidando??) con este regalo hermoso….

 

Political Prisoners/Presos Politicos

Every friday night – here in Pamplona, the families and friends of political prisoners that have been imprisoned all over parts of Spain and France,  gather in Paseo Sarasate to demonstrate their support for their loved ones…and their disgust towards the lack of human rights…the lack of concern and care shown by the spanish state towards these individuals….

Family and Friends of Basque Political Prisoners

As you may know by now…ive found a deep interest in this conflict…and I not only struggle with learning about it..trying to understand it (although I am sure I never will ) but I also struggle with my own inner conflict as to where my own ideology lies….where I draw the line with regards to the violence that happens here…ethically and morally…what my own beliefs are….

I am confronted..daily.. with these thoughts..with these issues… one way or another here….and I am constantly aware that these are deep rooted….profound issues of humanity….of human rights…the rights of a people…with a culture of their own…their own language and their own ideas of how they want or believe they should be governed….there are issues of torture and violence…of terrorism and fighting for what you believe in…and more and more I wonder why I dont have this same connection…or this same desire to do this from home….

Canadian Flag

Quebec Flag

Im from Canada …and we have our own conflict regarding nationalism…independence…we have a group of people with their own language and their own culture as well..

who also wish to be an independent nation…..maybe as i figure out my views regarding the conflict over here….perhaps my other views regarding a conflict closer to home…will unfold as well…

But back to this conflict…in this moment in time….every friday a large group of people gather in the centre of town..in an area called Paseo Sarasate…..their friends or their familes have been imprisoned….now…some definately are a part of or have had some connection with the Basque terrorist group ETA…others chose violent protest…but were not necessarily connected to the group per se….others are imprisoned simply because they chose to speak out about their beliefs and their ideas for their country and took a stand against the Spanish government….there are a number of reasons why these 800 and some political prisoners are behind bars….

Family of Political Prisoners Concentration

but what makes this area of the issue even more interesting is that these prisoners are treated quite differently than the rest of the spanish prisoners. Spanish law constitutes that every prisoner has the right to be jailed within his immediate area – in the prison closest to his home and family. Not Basque political prisoners.

These prisoners are jailed all over the country – hundreds of miles from their familes. Thier wives, husbands, children, parents, grandparents…all have to travel for hours and hours across the country for a 40 minute visit.

Most prisoners are granted trials promptly. Not Basque political prisoners. Some have sat in jail for years w/out being given a trial.

This  list continues and I will continue with it on another post to come….

As I said before – Im not quite certain where my beliefs lie when it comes to the large scale violence that has been born out of this conflict. Thats not to say I condone the violence….I by no means believe it is right to take another’s life….but I also have never been in these people’s shoes…what does it take for this kind of desperation to arise?

I have been thinking a lot lately about the movements and leaders of our past… that were pacifists..who also had something worth fighting for….I think of Ghandi…I think of non-violence…non violent resistance…non violent action….this is more where my truth lies….this more of how I wish the world could fight for its rights….well..i wish it didnt have to fight at all…but that is not a reality….but these individuals…Ghandi…Martin Luther King…Leo Tolstoy…there are countless others that have successfully achieved their goals through non violence….

The Mau movement of Samoa – this was a non violent movement that led to the political independence of Samoa in 1962 from colonial rule.

Between the 1920’s and 1940’s Ghandi led his nation in a series of nonviolent protests and civil disobedience. He successfully also gained independence.

Between 1955 and 1968 more nonviolent resistance…demonstrations..boycotts and protests were the main tools used during the African American Civil Rights movement. These actions not only brought about legislative change but were also a marking point in history.

The list goes on.  I do know, however, that this is where my truth lies. Some might call me naive. Some might say I have never had to fight for something like my independence….or my freedom….for my right to speak my own language…for my right to marry whomever I choose…..and they are right…I have never had to experience any of these injustices…I have been fortunate ….but my country is not perfect…and I may at some point have to fight for some of the above…if i shouldn’t be already…..and I can not say for sure – that violence is never necessary…..

and as I say this I think of Paul Watson and the Sea Shepherds – and for some reason – that kind of violence – I will openly agree with. There are animals…eco systems …forests…oceans…whales and sharks that are being killed….destroyed…to extinction…and so many sit idley by…doing little to nothing about it. But Paul Watson and his crew – are passionate….big hearted….strong willed individuals who choose to dedicate their lives to our earth…and its voiceless inhabitants….how could I not agree with them?

But I digress…..I may not support this violence  here -but I support these people’s right to choose how to govern their country….and I support them in wanting to fight for the rights of their children…their loved ones ..and for themselves.

For now…this is all I know.

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Cada vienes..por la noche…aqui en pamplona, las familias y amigos de los presos politicos- que estan en los carceles…en  todos partes de espania y francia – hacer un concentracion para demonstrar su apoya por sus queridos…y tambien por su disgust to the lack of human rights  ..the lack of concern and care shown by the Spanish state towards these individuals…..

Ya sabes – que tengo mucha interes en esto  conflict….y tengo una lucha a aprender sobre el…(aunque estoy segura que nunca voy a entender todo) pero tambien tengo una lucha con mi misma…un conflict interno sobre que es mi propia ideologia…donde dibujo la linea con respect a la violencia que ocurre aqui…eticamente y moralmente….cual son mis propias creencias…

Estoy confundida diario… con esos pensamientos .. con estas temas … de una forma o otra aquí …. estoy constantemente consciente que these are deep rooted  …. temas profundas de la humanidad… de los derechos humanos … los derechos de un pueblo … con su cultura propia … su propia lengua y sus propias ideas de cómo quieren o creen que they should be governed…. hay cuestiones de la tortura y la violencia …del terrorismo … y luchando por lo que uno cree .. y más y más me pregunto por qué no tengo ese mismo conexion … o este mismo deseo a aprender todo esto de mi propio pais..

Yo soy de Canadá … y nosotros tenemos nuestro propio conflicto en relación con el nacionalismo … independencia … tenemos un grupo de personas con su propia lengua y su propia cultura tambien….
y ellos también quieren ser una nación independiente ….. quizás cuando reglar mis opiniónes acerca del conflicto aquí …. quizás voy a discrurir mis opinions sobre el conflict de mi pais tambien…

Pero volvamos a este conflict…. en este momento…. todos los viernes.. un grupo muy grande de personas se reúnen en el centro de la ciudad….. sus amigos o sus familias estan en el carcel… estoy aprendiendo que si…algunas son definitivamente parte o han tenido alguna relación con el grupo terrorista vasco…. ETA …pero hay otros que  optaron por la protesta violenta … pero no necesariamente tienen relaciones con ETA…. y hay otros  que están en la cárcel simplemente porque eligió a hablar sobre sus creencias y sus ideas para su país y se pronunció contra el gobierno español…. hay muchas razones porque como 800 y algo presos políticos están tras las rejas….

Show romanizaPero para mi..que es muy interesante es que estos presos son tratados en una manera muy diferente que el resto de los presos españoles. La legislación española constituye que cada preso tiene derecho a ser encarcelado cerca de su pueblo… en los carceles más cercana a su hogar y su familia. Pero no los presos políticos vascos.

Estos presos están encarcelados en todo el país – cientos de kilómetros de sus familes. Sus esposas, esposos, hijos, padres, abuelos … todos tienen que viajar durante horas y horas de todo el país para una visita de 40 minutos.

Most prisoners are granted trials promptly. Not Basque political prisoners. Some have sat in jail for years w/out being given a trial.

La lista es grande…pero voy a continuar con esto en el otro post que viene pronto…

Como he dicho antes – no estoy muy segura de que son mis creencias..sobre  la violencia a gran escala que ha nacido de este conflict…. Y no estoy diceindo que condona la violencia …. no creo que tenemos la derecho a tomar un vida de alguien….. pero tampoco he estado nunca …en los zapatos de estas personas … ¿qué se necesita para este tipo de desesperación a surgir?

He estado pensando mucho últimamente sobre los movimientos y los líderes de nuestro pasado … ellos que eran pacifistas … que también tenían algo que vale la pena luchar…. pienso en Gandhi … pienso en la resistencia no violenta … la acción no violenta …. esto es más mi…. la verdad está presente más de cómo me gustaría que el mundo podría luchar por sus derechos ….bueno.. me prefiero que no tenemos que luchar.. pero esto no es realidad.. pero estos  personas …como Gandhi…y Martin Luther King … Leo Tolstoy … y hay muchos otros… que han logrado alcanzar sus objetivos  sin violencia…

El movimiento Mau de Samoa – esto era una movimiento no violentao que ganó la independencia política de Samoa en 1962 de la dominación colonial.

Entre los años 1920 y 1940, Gandhi llevó a su país en una serie de protestas no violentas y de desobediencia civil. El también gano la independencia.

Entre 1955 y 1968, mas  resistencias no violenta… manifestaciones… boicots y  protestas fueron las principales herramientas utilizadas durante el movimiento afro-americana de Derechos Civiles. Estas acciones no sólo produjo un cambio legislativo, sino también un punto marcado en la historia.

La lista continúa. Yo sé, sin embargo, que con cosas aquí… es donde esta mi verdad.  Algunos pueden llamarme ingeno o tonta… Algunos podrían decir que nunca he tenido que luchar por algo así …como mi independencia o la libertad….mi derecho a hablar mi propio idioma … por mi derecho a casarse con quien quiera ….. todos que van a decir esto..tienen razon… estoy muy afortunada…nunca he tenido este experiencia de cualquiera de estas injusticias … pero mi país no es perfecto … y yo creo..que quizas en algún momento …tengo que luchar por algunas cosas…. si no debería hacer luchando ya….. y no puedo decir con certeza…. de que la violencia nunca es necesario….

Cuando digo esto…pienso en Paul Watson y los “Pastores del Mar” o “Sea Shepherds” (in English)  y por alguna razón ….con esto tipo de violencia – estoy abiertamente de acuerdo. Hay animales … los sistemas eco… bosques … océanos…. las ballenas y los tiburones que están siendo asesinados…. destruido … hasta la extinción … y mucha gente estan ociosos…y estan hacienda poco o nada para ayudar ellos…y estos cosas hermosas de nuestra mundo…. Paul Watson y su equipo – son apasionados ….personas con grande  corazón….fuertes…y  que deciden dedicar sus vidas a nuestra tierra … y sus habitants que  no tienen voz …. ¿cómo no estar de acuerdo con ellos?

Pero estoy divagando …..tal vez no puedo apoyar este tipo de violencia aquí….no se….es un pregunta etica…. pero  apoyo el derecho de estas personas a elegir la forma de gobernar su país ….apoyo  en su deseo de luchar por los derechos de sus hijos … a sus queridos .. y por ellos mismos..

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Por ahora … solo se esto…

 

thursday.

I currently have about 38 ish tabs open on my computer screen….the topics range from LAB – a leftist nationalist union here in basque country to a few pages about learning euskera…..to a few pages on ETA and conflict resolution…to a page with a course Ive just signed up for called “Conflict Analysis”…to a few pages on knowing your rights as an activist….to a page or two on mudras (mudras are finger/hand postioning techniques for meditation) to a few pages on some news articles i have yet to read but want to get to soon from the BBC and the international crisis group….

does this mean i suffer from ADD?? I am not sure what to make of it..but if you could see inside my head..it would about the same….and its a bit overwhelming at times…im listening concierto No. 5 from Beethoven right now….to relax….i am so all over the place – not in any sort of negative way….just completely overwhelmed with excitement and frustration that i need to plug in and recharge a bit…a little meditation with some Buddhist chants usually help (and did about half hour ago) and now..its beethoven’s turn…

I think my calling is to do research..i love it..hence the 30 plus pages open on things I want to learn about… I cant get enough. I think this part of me is one of my best qualities but also one of my worst…

My day today was as all over the place as the 30 – something windows i have open on my screen right now….it consisted of carving a pumpkin with 2 boys (aged 4 and 7) whom have never.. in their lives carved a pumpkin…I put on some monster mash and we carved away….i think i had more fun than they did..they kept saying “que asko” which means…gross…they didnt like the smell of the pumpkin or the cleaning the insides out part…i had to laugh…after that..it was off

pumpkin we carved today - im no artist..

to my euskera class for 2 and half hours…then to tea with a classmate which was lovely….from there to a talk regarding living with or without capitalism…which was completely in spanish….and i think my limit for foreign languages for the day…my internal translator was shutting down at this point…

Can we live w/out Capitalism

…to a ‘concentration’in Plaza del Castillo in the old town – a concentration in spanish is basically a rally…without the walking…or yelling/chanting…basically the people just stand in one area with a sign….for a certain amount of time…

rally tonight

The sign reads in spanish and in euskera (of course)  “Por encima de las Multas – Mujeres a la calle” which translates as “on top of the fines – women take to the streets” – so much goes on here…that almost daily I am witnessing another rally, another statement being made, another concentration of people…for one cause or another….

Im learning that it almost always comes down to the basque conflict…and im also starting to feel a bit of the supression that happens here…which is why the minute i walked in the door tonight – i came straight to my room – put on some Buddhist chanting and meditated for what only felt like 15 minutes and ended up being closer 40.

Clearly i needed it. I have to be careful when i feel that kind of energy inside me…i need to recognize it almost before it builds…its this kind of energy that usually sends my heart into a not so fun tachycardic attack…. Its a combination of excitement to be apart of something so profound and important, passion to learn more, but also fear and frustration of what I am being told and of what I am witnessing…..which is why the moment i arrived home i knew i needed to do some damage control..hence the meditating…

I asked an acquaintance during the concentration if i could take a picture of the police that were at the rally tonight – i was told no. I can not. Its illegal and if they see me doing so – i could be in trouble….this is the point where I start to feel that heat building inside me….

I ask them what can happen – they could take my camera…they could fine me….at this point..the heat within has now grown into a small fire….

And then as Im speaking to someone else…im told once again – that I need to be careful to whom I ask my questions – I am told this often….and as they tell me this – they point to a plain clothed policeman…. who i hadnt noticed before – but suddenly stood out like a sore thumb….and im also told that they probably are aware im here – again.

The fire continues to rage….

They are aware I am here??!!!! What does that mean?? A few weeks ago someone else told me the same thing. I was told that – if i am asking so many questions…regularly…about the conflict…and I am showing up at various  rallies – that they are sure – the police are aware that I (or at least some canadian girl) is asking questions (perhaps too many) and that they are fully aware that I am here….

at this point i felt  like one of those cartoon characters that get so angry the steam literally pours out of their ears…..

they are aware im here???!! I cant take photos??!!

What do i do with that information?? What CAN i do with that information??

I think now you can understand why the moment i arrived home – a meditation was definitely in order…i needed to relax..i needed to accept what I had just  learned ..and let it go..for now…

I am Canadian. Whatever that means. I have rights. Whatever that means as well…No honestly…what does that mean???!! Because truth be told – I really have no idea what those rights are. Now thats scary. And i just realized it. Not too mention – my rights as an foreigner in a foreign country…what are they???  My classmate that was also at the concentration told me that the people here are accustomed to this kind of control – he then points out the numerous cameras on several different buildings that are taping us….that I also – had not noticed before…

so….the fire inside me has subsided for now…but I will not allow it to go out…that fire…that  paradox within me.. of fear and inspiration is what keeps me going….because I am just me..I am nobody..I am just a student…a privileged traveller…a concerned citizen that is interested in learning about her world…and if I feel that fear…i cant imagine what the people who are directly involved in these conflicts…in Palestine…in Afghanistan…in the DRC…in Darfur…..in Chiapas…or in Basque Country must feel…and because of this…because of them…I can not stop trying to understand…i can not stop learning or asking questions….or even just taking pictures and bearing witness to any of this…because they dont…and because they cant…so what right do i have to not  care….